Tribute to my Mother on her 1st Death Anniversary

It’s my absolute honour and privilege to tell you about the exceptional and courageous woman I was lucky enough to call my mother (Renu Sharma). Born in a countryside village near Pilkhua, in UP, India, she was the only daughter among 3 siblings. She was a graduate in arts, and political science and later on learned Astrology and Vastu as practised by her grandfather. 

Married at the young age of 19 years, she moved from a small town in UP to Ambala in Haryana. From there on she lived in various places such as Punjab, Haryana and Himachal, due to my father being a serviceman in defence. 

As she travelled and lived in a vast range of different cultures, she picked up many new skills in the arts, cooking, and painting and taught them to other aspirants. Besides, my mother was a fine stage actor and even wrote a few skits. Whenever she stepped into a room she brought a calming and joyful presence, she was literally and metaphorically speaking a bundle of joy and light. She had a knack for making friends, helping others and was never shy of taking initiative. She was bold and courageous. 

Fast forward to 2006 after the birth of my daughter, my mother lost vision in both her eyes at the age of 50. We were in complete disbelief and shock. However, despite the challenges with only 30% partial vision, she regrouped herself and continued living her life. She further engaged in doing social service for poor and deprived people by helping them financially or by other means. 

In the year 2011, while walking on the road my mother met with an accident where a ball and socket joint was inserted in her right leg. This made her mobility difficult, but she continued in her life with great courage and resilience. 

Late in 2012, she had another setback where her kidneys started deteriorating which impacted her emotionally and mentally. At the time doctors mentioned that she won’t live for more than 7-8 years and her kidneys will deteriorate further. In 2019, she was diagnosed with a stone in her kidneys and after that, she reached a stage where dialysis became a necessity. 

In late 2020, her dialysis started, and within 8 weeks she got infected with COVID and was hospitalised in the ICU. On Dec 22, 2020, she lost her will to live and passed away after a cardiac arrest. She was in the ICU bed for 30 days and suffered enormously during those 30 days due to the complexity and mismanagement of her treatment. 

Today she is not with us, Dec 11, 2021, was her 1st death anniversary (using the lunar calendar, according to Hindu rituals). As she completed her final journey in the universe, where her soul will be allocated a new place/body/planet after Dec 11, I remember she always use to say to us, to do the right thing in life, never lie, be righteous and help others with whatever means you have. 

The last 12 months have been a very challenging, painful and emotionally dragging journey for everyone in the family. It is hard to describe, but it’s been the most difficult time of my life. Her teachings remain entrenched in my memory and give me the strength to live and carry on.

PS: gratitude to the following people - Mr Sanjeev Tripathi, Mr Anil Sharma, Mr Soni, Mr Suri, Priest in Haridwar, Ms Patricia Karvelas.